One of my "selfs" I need to work on is self compassion. Being compassionate with other people is extremely easy for me, but I am not very good at being compassionate to myself. I am critical of myself and when I feel I may not have made the right choices I am very hard on myself. Being hard on yourself can be a good thing, but at some point you need to be kind and forgiving.
As I look back on my perceived bad decisions, bad choices or
mistakes I question those choices and beat myself up over them always looking at the negative aspect of the situation. I need to understand my perception now as I look back is one of clarity, understanding, and maturity of the situation and I am in a totally different place.
[Steps to Improve My Self-Compassion]
- Look at the positive parts of those decisions
- Focusing on the lesson learned to become a better person
- Let go and move on
- Journal the experience
I need to let go of the embarrassment and shame of going through difficult life events. Everyone goes through these type of life events and they can be hard for anyone.
Analyzing over and over every aspect of my decisions and second guessing myself needs to stop. I need to remind myself I was in a different state of mind at that time in my life. Those decisions were made and can't be changed. I believe in my heart I made the right choices but certain outcomes make you question yourself. Self-judgment can lead to anxiety, insecurity or depression.
As I reflect on my self-compassion I am looking for ways to be more compassionate and forgiving with myself. This self healing will be a longer journey than the others.